Me and my rumbles..

I am a SAHM by choice.. 

  

My life used to be close to perfect, a job that gives me a decent salary, a helper that takes absolutely good care of my 3 kids, a neat home when i return after work, a husband that fetches me to and fro work, we could go dating almost anytime we want as we have a trust-worthy helper.. But it has since changed the day i decided i wanted to spend more time with my children.

  

I have been almost doing nothing at home but to play and "entertain" my youngest child, surf the net, do some housework and cooking etc.. 

  

We used to have a domestic helper but as the kids grow, we realized they have been very dependent on the helper. They will go "auntie, please pour me a cup of water", "auntie, please take my towel for me", after dinner, they will just leave the plates on the table for the helper to clear-up after them and the list goes on and on..  As such, we have to make a painful decision for the helper to go.. 

The house have been in a messy state since the helper left, and i wonder is it because i am in the midst of re-arranging stuffs or am i really so hopeless with housework..  My husband have been very upset but am not too sure is it because he has to return to a messy home, or, is it because i have really no time for him these days.. We don't seems to be able to hold a decent conversation with each other without either 1 of the kids interrupting us these days.. And as my lil girl has become closer to me after the helper left, she's now insist that neither the father, nor the brothers can hold my hands when we are out and she will start to throw herself onto the floor if we refuse.

  

Haiz.. What should i do?